Gaining traffic for a blog is difficult. You tell your friends, write some stuff you hope people will find compelling, and hope for the best. Winning awards is a good way to drive traffic to the site, and adding a little trophy to the page really classes up the joint, kind of like a 1970s Topps baseball card.
Recently, I was nominated for the Platinum Award for Excellence in Humor Blogitry (PAEHB). I was up against “Hyperbole and a Half," “Sad and Useless,” “Mudflap Bubbas,” and “The Drudge Report.” The judges at the Platinum Internet Foundation determined that my site was unquestionably the best, making me 2010’s PAEHB winner. I was so delighted when I heard the news, I peed a little.
Some people have questioned the merit of this award. They point out that this is the first year the prize has been awarded. They also point out that the Platinum Internet Foundation seems to exist only to award the PAEHB. Furthermore, records show that the foundation’s president is Will Divide, and the only other people allowed to vote for the award are the Board of Directors, consisting of Will Divide’s grandmother and great aunt, with the later two declined to vote for anyone.
To the people that believe the PAEHB is bullshit, I’d like to point out that the leading candidate for the Senate from Kentucky has done the exact same thing. The main difference between what I’ve done and what Rand Paul did is that I only gave myself a fake web award. Paul certified himself to be a practicing Ophthalmologist (which is apparently legal in Kentucky).
The moral in all of this, is that if you hitch your moral compass to politicians, you can get away with nearly anything. I think I’ll hire a prostitute.
No comments:
Post a Comment