Thursday, July 1, 2010

Bedroom Surprises

Being a 37 year old single woman isn’t easy. Single men my age are single for obvious reasons. Some of them never learned proper hygiene. Others think that the subject of an entertaining conversation is the success of their Orge in World of Warcraft. Of course there’s always the horribly unattractive bunch.

That’s why I tend to look for divorced guys. They have a good reason for being in their late 30s and single. Also, after having put up with ex-wives, divorced men are usually desperate for a woman to treat them decently.

Greg seemed like an ideal candidate for me. He got married at 21 and divorced last year. Greg’s very attractive and can easily pass for a man 10 years younger than he is. In conversation, Greg has a way of extracting humor from situations, which showed me that despite the divorce he still has an optimistic view of life. After several great makeout sessions, it was time to take it to the next level.

Before we got naked, Greg said he had something important to say to me. I started to freak out, preparing myself to hear that he is HIV+ or something. It turns out that Greg has a genetic defect called Antley-Bixler Syndrome, which makes his genetalia abnormally small. I asked him to pull down his pants, and there framed by two shapely thighs was a package that looked like it belonged on a cherub statue. I tried to be a good sport, so I played with it some, but I felt like a child molester. Luckily, Greg got off from this, so I excused myself with claims of early meetings, cleaned up, and went home.

I won’t ever see Greg again. I know that makes me shallow, but a woman has needs too.

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