I like to have sex with music on, but not for the reason most people do. People use music to drown out the noise of squeaky beds and ecstatic moans. Some use it to set the right mood. I use it to help me figure out how long I’ve been doing the deed. After four decent-length songs, it’s time to consider busting a nutt.
What music is appropriate to accompany lovemaking? Marvin Gaye, Billie Holliday, and Barry White are good for setting the right ambiance. Basically, any pre-1980 music from a black singer that sings about male/female relations qualifies. Although not necessarily romantic, just about any music that isn’t gabba techno, math rock, or loud, moody orchestral music will do.
The other night, Janelle and I are in bed and feeling amorous. I put on the album “Who Will Cut Our Hair When We’re Gone” by The Unicorns. Although it isn’t romantic music, I love the album, and it won’t do anything to kill the mood. Janelle and I spent a lot of time squeezing, rubbing, and fondling, so that by the time we actually started screwing, we were listening to the song Les Os, which is the second-to-last song on the album. The album finished, and iTunes went to the next song - the Urge Overkill song from the Pulp Fiction soundtrack. The thrusting continued.
When the next dong came on, we had to stop. I think it’s physically impossible for non-hearing-impaired people to have sex to “We Are the World” by USA for Africa. Instead of orgasmic and post-coital bliss I laid with Janelle pointing out the Huey Lewis and Bob Dylan parts of the song while watching my hard on subside.
iTunes needs some sort of “Kill the Mood” to help prevent moments like this.
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