Tell me about yourself.
Are you the kind of guy that needs a lot of sympathy when your team loses the big game, but at the same time are emotionally distant when your something big happens to your girlfriend, like a parent dying?
Do you fly into fits of anger when over minor setbacks, such as dinner being a little overcooked?
Are you selfish at sex, always making sure that your needs are met without regard to how the woman is enjoying it?
Do you like to give backhanded compliments, such as, “It’s okay that you no longer fit into those leather pants. I never liked them anyway.”?
Are you able to belittle your girlfriend’s opinions, saying stuff like, “Sufjan Stevens sounds like they castrated Paul Simon, and he’s whiney because he wants his balls back. Let’s put on some Kid Rock instead.”?
Do you make money but make your girlfriend pay for everything?
Have you ever ditched an important event with your girlfriend because you didn’t want to miss a TV show?
Do you like to hit on other women while in the presence of your girlfriend?
Are you drunk or on drugs frequently to the point of needing someone to care for you?
Have I got the woman for you! It’s my ex-girlfriend. She’s beautiful, can hold her own in a conversation, and is pretty good in bed. You won’t be disappointed there.
You may be asking, “Why is this woman’s ex-boyfriend looking for a guy for her?” The way I see it, just because we’ve broken up, doesn’t mean I don’t want her to be happy.
these are my favorites
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