If I were to die tomorrow, I don’t expect people to make a big fuss over it. Sure, people will be sad, but they’ll get over it. I’m more concerned about what will happen to this blog upon my death.
Of course I do not want someone to continue the blog using the Will Divide pseudonym, as I don’t think any living writer could successfully match my level of genius. Fashionable Amish should be retired and put into book form. I’m sure Random House or Simon & Schuster can see the piles of money to be made publishing high quality, entertaining prose.
Sales will probably start slowly but turn into a raging forest fire with a strong word-of-mouth and Twitter campaign. From there it will explode, with featured stories about the book on Yahoo and AOL, a NYT book review, and glowing reports on all the network nightly news programs.
One enterprising junior professor at some liberal arts college will start a class on the writings of Will Divide. Students will study subjects such as Will Divide, Jr.’s sociological tautology. The work will prove so ripe for academic analysis, that other professors around the world start teaching my writing. Soon, volumes of critical analysis of Fashionable Amish will line college libraries everywhere, with titles such as “Unfashionable Amish: How Will Divide Revolutionized Modern Writing.”
A few disenfranchised people in Portland will be so inspired by my writing that they form a religion based on it. At first people will scoff at them, but eventually my writing will prove so powerful that people will join the religion en masse. After a few years, all the people of the world will follow the religion based on my writing, and world peace will be achieved.
Is that too much to ask?
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